Everything Belongs

Everything belongs. The good, the bad, the beautiful, the ugly, what is painful and what is not, what is easy and what is difficult, what we like and don't like, what we want and not want, they all belong. The problem is that we wish things did not belong. We want to have certain things only and other things we want out of our lives. But irrespective of what we want and what our opinion of these things are they all belong. They all have a place right here and an equal right exist right now just as much as I do.

I found this insight extraordinary. All of life, we try to get close to things that are good to us, things that make us feel better and get away from things that are not good to us and things that make us feel lousy. But the judgment is made by us and no one else. The outcome of that judgement is felt by us and no one else. That makes us life easy or difficult. So I create the world I live in. I create the emotions that I feel. I am finding this extraordinary. I have no other words to describe it right now. It's shocking too. So much we have in control yet we walk like the world is responsible for what we go through and how we feel. When we are totally in control of how we feel and what we go through. Perhaps the what part might not be in total control. I mean...I could lose my bags on a 9 days trip, my sister can say mean things to me....these things I don't have control over but how I respond to them, is totally within my grasp.

So what do we complain, blame and become miserable and hateful and resentful? Is it because we don't understand what we are capable of? Or is it that we don't want to take that control for ourselves? Are we scared of such exercise of freedom and right? Are we intimidated by that? Or are we in unfamiliar grounds? That amount of freedom given to us, when we don't know what to do with it and how to maneuver ourselves within that space that's totally ours? I don't know the answers.

But from where I come, I feel that for me, it's a little bit of all of that and perhaps more that I haven't yet understood. But whatever it is, I understand that everything has a right to be. There is no point in me, trying to wish things that did not exist or things exist. These kinds of wishing and hoping even a little makes my life difficult, creates turmoil in my emotional world. What for? Does that help me? No but I still find myself wanting and not wanting things. It seems crazy to me that despite understanding this, I still could wish for what does not make me peaceful.

This is the very reason that my mediations can go up and down. I have seen and noticed that when there is peace I like it and when there are thoughts I don't. I wish for peace and I don't wish for lack of it. But my wishing no matter how many times and how long does not make peace or lack of it, more possible or less impossible. But when I let both be, as Ajahn always tells, then I am at peace. So I realize that all belong. There is no need to wish or not wish. You just have to allow things to be.