Dhamma (Protection)

Two weeks ago, before the start of the Dhamma school Ven. Somananda gave a mini talk on what Dhamma meant. It was such a brief but a meaningful talk that resonated with me very deeply. It was about the meaning of Dhamma. Dhamma means protection, to up hold. The Buddha said that whoever upholds the Dhamma is protected by the Dhamma itself. Over the last 4-5 years of my life I have begun to understand the true meaning and the depth of what the Buddha said. There is a profundity that I didn't realise for many years but only started to understand along with serious practice and dedication to the five precepts, meditation and striving for a life that falls in life with that of what the Buddha preached.

Dhamma truly is a protector. But it does not protect just by the fact that you are a Buddhist. It does not protect you just because you are well-versed in the suttas, the pali canon, and all the teachings of the Buddha. The Dhamma protects one only when one becomes the Dhamma itself. One must put aside all notions, beliefs, knowledge, views and a sense of self and truly give oneself to the practice of Dhamma and then the wheel begins to turn. It was fascinating to observe and see the process unfolding within oneself. It's like the blossoming of a flower. One cannot make it open its petals, but one can only make the sun shine upon the flower bud and wait for the petals to open up. So too does Dhamma. As it grows in you, Dhamma opens around you like a protective sheath, surrounding you in its cover. It's not a cover that's visible. It's an invisible sheath of protection that you carry with you as long as you maintain the practice.

It's so very powerful but unlike many things in the world that can be seen, heard, touched, smelled Dhamma cannot be felt by the senses. This is what makes things hard for us all, including myself. Because it's all within oneself away from the normal sense contacts and the sense world, it's easy to stray away from that and swept by the currents of what is immediately in front of you. So, we depend on the protections provided by the sense contacts and the sense world. For example, we depend and we put so much effort and importance to material things like houses, money, cars, and more houses and all kinds of other things but none of these things give us protection. Perhaps in the short-term from the sun, rain, snow, winds etc but all these things are subject to change and decay. Also as we change the allure and the fascination these things hold for us wither away. Both are temporary.

So, we seek protection in what is temporary and flimsy. But yet find great solace in them. However, just because we cannot see, hear and touch we don't make the effort to seek what can provide us eternal protection: the Dhamma. It's hard and requires much work and effort. I find it so very ironic that people are willing to work their butts off in going to work for more than 8 hours a day for 5 days a week and sometimes even more, raise a family and feed them and look after them and work like dogs to continue feeding them and up keeping them, cook, clean, shovel snow and do numerous tedious work day in day out and yet not allocate a single hour or a day or a few days a year to their spiritual development. None of the day to day things they do, have much benefit to each one of us other than ensure our survival for the length of period we live...then we are gone. But we work and fret over things like we would live a life time.

But no one thinks of the eternal life that each one of MUST ride on our own even after death. That life has to be walked whether we like it or not. But none of the activities that we do for our survival in this life, would help us in that journey. But no one thinks of this. I don't understand why? Is it because the question is not pressed hard enough? Perhaps that's why old people start visiting the temples and start observing sil, or giving more danas? Because with old age comes the pressing issue of death. But when we are young, no such pressing issue?! How ignorant are we?

Anyway, Dhamma will only protect those who live according to Dhamma. We have to shape our lives according to Dhamma whether we like it or not. It helps to realise the deeper truth presented by the Buddha rather than read them and understand them as just another intellectual jargon. That way shaping our life becomes that much easier. When one shapes life according to the Dhamma, one becomes something larger than oneself. Dhamma is the truth of everything. As we shape our lives according to the Dhamma we align ourselves to the greater truth of things. By doing so, we becomes one with things as they should be rather than fighting against it. That's why great arahants could live life in total harmony, because they were in sync with everything.

In the world, we ask for what cannot be, we crave for what is not real and is in constant friction with life and everything and truth. Basically we are living against the Dhamma. That's why there is so much misery, heartache, disappointments, anger, rejection, disapproval. When one starts to align oneself with the Dhamma all these above things fall by the way side because ones perspective change and along with that one beings to see the truth and way things are rather than things ought to be according to ones egotistical wishes and whims. When that happens life starts to synchronize.

It's the most beautiful thing in the world. But it takes time and work. Not outside work but much introspection and contemplation. It takes self-discipline and single-minded dedication. But when your life starts taking shape you can see for yourself the beauty of the Dhamma. The great benefits borne in the heart. They are the miracles of life.

May you too find the miracles that lie deep in your heart!

Roles that we play!

Role Playing is a popular adult-learning method. It gives the opportunity for people to step into the roles of others and play them so they may get a better understanding of what people in that particular role go through. For example, managers play roles of their subordinates, people in customer services play the role of their customer, so they get to feel what's it like to walk in the shoes of another. But the good thing about this type of role playing is that we know we are role playing and what type of role playing we are engaged in and that we can get out of it when the game is over.

There is another kind of role playing that we do all throughout our lives. That kind of role playing, for most of times we don't even know we do it, we don't know why we do it in the first place and most importantly we don't know that we have a choice to play or not to play. This is the role playing we do in every day of our lives as a mother, father, son, daughter, a boss, a worker, a husband, a wife, a grandmother, a grandfather, an aunt, an uncle, a granddaughter, a grandson and the list goes on and on.

Each role is played in the drama we call 'life': at different times or sometimes at the samtime. But we play them nevertheless. The society (including our loved ones) determine how these role ought to be played. There are boundaries, specifications/expectations assigned to each of these roles. As we take on each one, we have to start playing them. It's like a broadway show or a movie. You have lines and certain ways to depict your character. In the same fashion one must play the roles in life as well.

Now, some of you would argue to say that I am mistaken. That you have the right to chose and that in your roles things are not that cut and dry. My question to you is 'Really?' Please try stepping out of the boundaries, expectations set and see the reactions. What reactions would you get? So, we, humans (who are supposed to be able to have a higher thinking function and an ability to carve out their own destiny) are reduced to puppets who are made to dance according to the movements of the strings called 'roles'. Isn't that the funniest thing in the world? Actually NO! The funniest thing is that majority of us, willingly and happily dance all of our lives without much questioning.

The few who have risen to question and refused to dance have withered the storms that have filled many history books or have become sacrifical lambs. So, we dare not challenege the greater wisdom (or should I say idiocy) of society.

Why do we do role playing? I have come to understand that humans do this out of desire, fear and lack of understanding.

We role play out of wanting to belong (desire). We fear rejection. Those who have stepped out of boundaries have done so with great personal and even professional sacrifice at the given point of time. So, they gave up both fear of rejection and desire of wanting to belong. But humans in general want to feel part of a pack. We are social creatures so we need to feel a sense of belonging and we will go to great lengths to move into the circle rather than stay outside of it. Then the biggest reason of all is lack of understanding. If we understood and had clarity as to 'why' then neither fear nor desire will exist. They will fall by the way side. But because we don't have clear comprehension we are stuck.

One of the things we needs to understand is that is that none of these roles are written in stone. Everything changes. With time and place and people it all changes. No one needs to feel that they have to fit into something they don't want to. There is no need for a sense of oppression which leads to depression. Trying to play a role that one is not comfortable or don't want to is like trying to fit into a size 2 dress size when you are a 6. Or for guys trying fitting into a pair of pants a few sizes too small. How would you feel? Even if you squeeze yourself in it, because you have to, will you last long? Will you enjoy it? Can you have fun? Investigate and answer for yourself.

Another understanding is that we can be that change. We have the choices. People fear change. They fear change in themselves as much as they fear change in others. It's two sides of the same coin really. One doesn't go without the other. We alone have the choices. The execution of the choices are also ours. But what people cannot and will not wither are the consequences. Because of thise even when people have choices, they walk as if they don't. They remain puppets hung up by strings. Because making choices gives ownership and that is a scary proposition for most humans. Taking a choice is taking a stand. People are scared of taking a stand. When you take a stand you are by yourself. This removes you from the pack. People don't want this. They would rather bask in the false security of belonging to something than take a stand facing the truth that ultimately you are and will always be alone. Please don't mistake 'alone' with 'loneliness' here.

Another is that when you stretch out of desire to please others, it will somewhere down the road will exhaust you. People get frustrated, angry, feel let down, depressed because they do so much out of desire to please and find that after all what they have said and done, they are still left standing on their own. It is the most saddest and dissapointing thing of all. So, if you are going to do stuff for others be realistic and don't do it because you want to please others or out of a desire to be included or praised. Do it because it is what you genuinely want to do. Be true to yourself above all. This is the guts to stand on your own.

Another is that when you don't stretch out of fear, it stalls your own growth. I said to someone recently that people mature in their bodies but never in their minds. Humans minds stay immature as when they are in their teen years sometimes, even when they are in their 50's and 60's. Isn't that sad? This happens because we don't allow ourselves the right to grow. We constantly contain ourselves within the boundaries set for us by others. Please note that being a CEO doesn't make us emotionally mature. It only makes us live in the boundaries of society. Being a millionarire doesn't make us emotionally mature, it makes us a prisoners within the desires set by society.

So because of these things we don't develop our understanding. Because of it our understanding does not have the depth to see the role playing we do. To see why we do the role playing. Why we continue to do so despite the physical and emotional hardships that come long with it. It is very unfortunate. These are truly the ties that bind us.

I find it so fascinating. I mean I myself have done this for many years in my own life. But I have always questioned the wisdom of society as a whole and searched for a one of my own. I always believed that life was more than what it was presented to me by my elders and those around me. I always believed that there was something out there. Despite how unpopular I got, how intolerable I got and how rejected, ridiculed and reprimanded I got, I stuck to my guns, because I trusted my instincts above all. Then I was shown bits and pieces of that truth from a far away place over the last couple of years. A place I didn't think existed but I knew in my heart was there. In many ways, I felt free. It wasn't even a sense of validation. It was a sense of freedom. My heart felt an upliftment and a setting of free. Like a bird being able to finally fly away. I was finally able to fly in my own truth. A beautiful feeling of joy, wonderment, freedom and gratefulness.

I wish people could see this. Ajhan Brahm says this so well. He says that we have locked ourselves in a prison and the door of that prison is open to us at all times but we just don't want to walk out of it. I truly understand what he says. It's the most beautiful thing in the world. It's the most freeing thing in the world as well.